"Slow and steady wins the race" or "How did we get here?" part 5

Mr. Grits got home with Poo from soccer practice and decided to watch some documentary on meth, which grosses me out and bores me to tears.  The top 2 kids have fever and went to bed early, so I grabbed the laptop and thought I'd try to pound out a little more of the story, which starts here. 

I hung up the phone and sat with a stunned smile on my face for quite a while.  It was the rush of doing something different.  Of making that move.  Of going forward.  It was a real rush.  I was so excited that we were finally responding.  My honey was in seminary.  We were going into the ministry. 

I know what you are thinking... that how on earth would I be thrilled that he just up and decided to start seminary without telling me he was going to do it?  Well, we had talked about it many times, that we thought that's what he should do.  After a while, we were convinced it was the right thing to do.  That's where the disobedience came in.  We hesitated to do it. 

But at last we were underway.  Almost like a long anticipated journey, and you've just gotten in the car or on the airplane.   We were almost giddy.  Almost immediately we began to feel the Lord's blessing on what we were doing-- I don't know that I've ever shared this with anyone, but his schooling has even been paid for and all he has to do is get his books.  We were finally feeling the joy that comes from obedience. 

Shortly after he started school, I remember all of a sudden one day flipping out-- I was going to be a pastor's wife one day?  Um, does anyone know me?  Surely you know that I'm no Sallie/ Barbara Barker or whoever.  I'm the most impulsive, emotionally-charged, immature person I know.  And I'm an open book.  I never know when to keep my mouth shut.  There's no way that I will be the person I need to be to fill these shoes!  I'm going to make some mad, for sure.  I'll be insensitive.  Everyone knows I'm not a compassionate person.  I got panicked.   I was so thankful that Mr. Grits had settled in to a good steady routine of doing most of his reading and studying on his lunch break and while he waited for Jojo at soccer practice.  Meanwhile, I was flying apart!  And one day, we'd have to leave our wonderful little church and all our friends... it was just too much...

To be continued...

Comments

[caroline]

Blessed obedience....Love it.

[MaryLu]

Oh, do I ever know that feeling. Behind him, yet wondering, what in the world am I doing here? Knowing that he can be all that God wants him to be, but, me? No preacher's wife, for sure!
Oh, do I ever know those feelings!

[Meg]

Hey friend! I've missed all the posting this week... just checking in tonight from NY!!! You've been busy, but I do want to hear the rest. How many installments do you anticipate?? Isn't it theraputic to go back and tell the story???? I can't believe it's been seminary since 2002...

I probably won't get back on until Sunday. I've been able to go on-line, and check e-mail but for some reason can't send e-mail so this will do.

We're having a blast... but are so very tired. I got to see my college roommate today... she has 3 cute girls. Matt is visiting some HS friends tonight and we're planning to leave early tomorrow for a day in Boston and then home. Phew.

You will be a wonderful pastor's wife. :-)