Reformed Grits

It's blogworthy to me

Thanks for coming back to check on me in my prolonged absence.  I'm not "back" but I've been thinking of you.  It's hard to go back to regular blogging when you stop cold turkey but I've needed the break.  But I just can't get enough of you, my friends, so I thought of something I should share:

First, I'm struggling to do dinner right now.  I don't wanna cook.  It's hot and I am really not in to eating things that are good for me because they don't taste good and are expensive.  So we've eaten chicken and minute rice 15 ways, had tacos and/or spagetti every other night and I'm tired of it.  So when I ran in to Publix the other night to pick up something I needed, they had a little cook-person handing out samples of one of their "Apron Meals." 
"Would you care for a sample of our 'Beenie Weenie Pizza'?" 
And then I threw up a little in my mouth and willed out, "Uh, no thanks."  The two kids with me obliged the lady and then I realized... I was STARVING.  I wasn't even sure when I had eaten last so I said, "I changed my mind... I'll try it." 
And with that, I scarfed it down, trying to not taste it...
But it actually was really good.  So I went back and got the recipe card.
And that night I found myself thinking about it again. 
That's when I started plotting out when I'd get the ingredients to make it myself.  It was so strangely satisfying, like some weird comfort food.  I wanted it again.  I started craving Beenie Weenie Pizza.  But I had to wait until grocery day, because you know Dave Ramsey lives here and I had my money doled out already. 
Here I need to interject some important commercial information.  Did you know that Publix sells pizza DOUGH?  I'm talking the squishy stuff in a bag in the bakery.  It. Is. Delicious.  And this, from someone who grinds her own wheat to make her pizza dough normally.  It was more expensive than I'd like (2.59 a bag, for Pete's sake) but I had to try it. 
Back to the story.  Grocery day came, and could hardly wait until I got my goods to make the much-anticipated Beenie Weenie Pizza.  The kids were in a frenzy from hearing about it from me and the other children who had the privilege of sampling it. 
That night, would be Beenie Weenie Pizza night. 
After a few stops and starts with the crust (does anyone have a two sided grill?  I'm thinking that's like a Foreman grill which they do NOT make in a size big enough for the Grits family and if they do I don't care to try to store one in my kitchen...) we were underway.   Reading the recipe, I did a double-take as I realized that the recipe was for four.  I had already planned to double it, but as I was reading the recipe I realized that their recipe for "four" would feed only Mr. Grits.  Seriously, people, tearing the original pizza dough ball in half and making it into an 8x10 oval?  Is that about the size of two normal pieces of pizza, or is it just me?  That is supposed to be the main course for 4?  That's just enough food to tick us off.  So I'm scrambling, folks, finding more beenies and more weenies and then I realized the kids hadn't liked the onions so what should I do to compensate for that, and the dough.  Oh the dough.  For real, it's delicious.  But it's made of silly putty.  No, no.  Silly putty actually stays flat if you make it flat.  This was some sort of flubber.    Consider trying to make a pizza crust out of something that did not want to be made in to pizza crust.  It had a will of its own.  And it was some seriously strong-willed pizza crust. 
It was at this point that the reality-- and insanity-- of what I was doing hit me.  I was making Beenie Weenie Pizza.  Which upon hearing the name of it had originally make me do a baby barf.  I was now attempting to stretch out some half-dried gluey dough into a semblance of... dinner for my family?  Stop the insanity! 
At this point, Sister began to hover around and I had to confess that I had failed her... not only as a person who was supposed to feed her and nurture her, but to protect her from the evils of the world-- like Beenie Weenie Pizza. 
An hour and a half later, we sat down to this "easy and delicious recipe that may take as little as 15 minutes to prepare" and I probably should have set the table with spoons and bowls.  Yes, I followed the recipe but it was a MESS.  Most of the kids loved it.  Bee pushed it away and said, "I no wannit."   Mr. Grits tolerated it, and actually may have liked it.  I couldn't bring myself to ask and he never complains when I go to the trouble to cook a meal for him.  No one had enough to eat, however, so I whipped out some chips and dip, and veggies to dip as well because like I mentioned-- I'm all about health food right now. 
My friends, I have hit my all time low in life.  Considering that it was a good idea.  Spending hard-won money on it.  And serving it to my beloved family. 
We all may need to seek professional help after this.  Pray for us, my friends.  Pray for us. 

I dare you to try this one...

Ok, I mentioned leeks yesterday and I had never had a leek before I went to Scotland last year.  I'd seen them in the stores but had never bought one. 
Now, it's a deep love in my life.  Leeks.  Yum. 
A leek tastes like a VERY mild onion.  And because you use the greens, it's a really healthy veggie!  When preparing leeks, you have to know this is no green onion.  You have to cut off the greens and separate them out because sand lodges in the leaves and they have to be washed separately.  It's a labor of love.   But before I turn you away from trying it, shall I mention... bacon? 

This is my Americanized adaptation of THIS recipe from the ASDA website which is Walmart's UK division.  Yeah, I know, I just got a great recipe from Walmart of all places whose produce I wouldn't touch with a 10 meter pole.  But I like to think I got this recipe from dear Wilma, and when I make it I want to take the whole pan and sit in her little summer house in the back yard, eat it with a fork turned down, and listen to the absence of crickets and frogs chirping at night.  This is comfort food at it's finest and I think you will agree. 

If you dare! 

Cheesy Potato Bake

2 lbs. scrubbed, red potatoes, sliced thin
1/2 lb bacon, cut in bite sized pieces
2 leeks, thinly sliced (I used one this last time since I was cooking for the kids.  Yes they ate it.)
2 T. olive oil
1 sprig rosemary
6 oz. freshly grated romano (or the gruyere is good if you can afford it!)

Preheat oven to 350. 
Gently boil the potato slices in salted water for 10 minutes.   Drain.
Fry up the bacon and drain on paper towel.  Use a T or so of the bacon grease to wilt the leeks.
Toss the potatoes, leeks, and bacon with the olive oil and rosemary.
Put the mixture in a greased 9x13 pan.
Scatter the cheese over the top and bake for 20 minutes. 
Hide from the family while eating it alone. 
Come and leave me a comment telling me that you are leaving your earthly goods to me. 
The end.

Cow Appreciation Day

If you didn't know, today is Cow Appreciation Day at Chickfila!  Today only, if you dress like a cow in any shape, fashion, or form-- head to toe-- then you are entitled to a free meal!  If you just go minimally (cow nose, couple spots, or horns) then you get a free entree!  This is good for breakfast, lunch, and dinner so go eat some chikin! 
We had breakfast this morning...

So get out there and get a great lunch!  (or dinner...!)

This will fatten you up a bit

Last June, I mentioned that my kids won first place in a church contest for their banana pudding (I feel the need to say puddin') and I thought since spring is here and summer's a'comin' you might like to have it just in case you need one.  I must give you a little background on where this recipe came from.  In coming up with the recipe for the contest, they looked over a number of recipes for banana pudding in magazines (mostly Southern Living) and cookbooks, and we talked about what in the recipe made it good or bad, whether it was using milk vs. cream vs. half and half; lots of butter or not; meringue vs. whipped cream vs. cool whip; flour to thicken or cornstarch, etc.  It was really educational and fun.  In the end, they decided on these ingredients and proportions, and lemme tell you, they work.  My butt gets bigger (and rounder) just putting the ingredients in the buggy at the store.

Grits' Kids Banana Puddin'
4 c. Half and half
4 egg yolks
1 1/2 c. sugar
1/4 t. salt
1/3 c. flour
3 T. butter
1 T. pure vanilla extract
4 large, ripe bananas-- sliced  (We dip ours in lemon juice to prevent browning)
1- 12 oz. box 'Nilla wafers
1 1/2 c. whipping cream
3 T. powdered sugar

1.  Heat the half and half, egg yolks, sugar, salt, and flour over low heat.  Stir constantly for 20 minutes or until thick.  (It usually takes at LEAST this long.)  Take off heat and add butter and vanilla. 
2.  In a trifle bowl, add half the cookies, half the bananas and half the pudding.  Repeat.  Refrigerate until cool. 
3.  Just before serving, whip whipping cream and powdered sugar until it's stiff.  Spread over pudding.  4.  Call 911 cuz you are about to have a heart attack. 

P.S.  Don't even think about stealing this recipe if we have another dessert contest at our church.  ;-)

Intervention needed-- HELP

Mr. Grits has taken Jojo and Sydney to watch their favorite MMA crap match tonight at a friend's house; the youngest 4 are now in bed.  I'm in my PJ's.  There is a box (NO, not even homemade; don't freak out on me) of Betty Crocker Supreme Triple Chunk Brownies that climbed the stairs from my basement pantry supply (all by themselves!) and is now sitting on my bed, beckoning me to partake.   

I am about to eat some serious brownie dough.

My belly fat would appreciate it if someone would call and make me stop. 

I may cry if you do it though.

Just call me Betty Crocker

Tonight we had some seriously YUM Chicken-and-Artichoke-Salad that I decided needed something besides like, boring crackers to go with it.  Somewhere in the craziness of my brain, I got a wild hair (in my brain) that homemade whole-wheat English muffins would be gooood with this. 
Have I mentioned that my beloved Mr. Grits bought me a grain mill for Christmas in 06?  This was my favorite Christmas gift.  EVER.  Yes, it's something I wanted and I love gifts like this.  I know it sounds old fashion, or like I'm working too hard when I could buy bread for like $2.00 at the bread store but there's NOTHING like this. 
But I digress...
I found a recipe from my deeleecious Bread Becker's Recipe Book for whole wheat (from my grain mill) English Muffins.  It didn't look too difficult or time consuming, so I thought I'd give it a whirl.  Not much time or many ingredients invested later, after 2 rises, I had 2 cookie sheets of risen, yeasty dough patties to cook on a griddle...  yes, you cook English Muffins on a buttered griddle.  Who know? 
Y'all.  They were some good.  You really can make English Muffins.   And they were OH so much better than the nasty store things. 
In fact, I'm ruined. 
Oh dear...

It's all over but the cleanin'

So Christmas is over at the Grits' house.  I have already started the jolly task of putting away the decorations.  Call me Scrooge, but when it's over... I'm over it.  Now it's just procrastinating if I don't do it quickly.  And getting dustier.  What is the deal with Christmas decorations that they "make" dust.  My house is NEVER dustier than when I am pulling them down.  Geesh. 
The kids had a great Christmas... I think everyone got what they wanted and then some.  We were blessed in a special way in that we were able to give our kids something they always wanted and that we never thought we'd be able to provide...  They got a foosball table!  It has been a lot of fun (and whining) and we are really enjoying it. 
I never want to see rich food again.  No, really.  Well, ok, maybe starting at Thanksgiving 08.  Just at our house we had sausages wrapped in bacon and covered in brown sugar, crab dip, spinach dip, hummus, cheeses and meats on Hawaiin bread rolls with all kinds of sauces; candy and cookies out the wazoo, drinks and special "treats" along with every kind of food you can imagine.  I was really excited that I actually had decent serving dishes for it all.  We love appetizers and instead of a big meal, we "appetize" ourselves into the next pant-size.
So here is our "Best of..." the season!

BEST NEW FOOD
My one new love from the holidays was something my sister sent over for my birthday... she made up the batter for Hot Buttered Rum.  I always thought this sounded disgusting but I am addicted.  It is SO delicious and I find myself with the need to drink before lunchtime.  I am resisting, you will be pleased.
BEST NEW GIFT
Ok, so I mentioned the foosball table, but the one we are REALLY all enjoying is the Wii!   I am sore from "bowling" with Mr. Grits last night and I'm sure I'm going to need a minor surgery to repair my bladder after laughing it out of my body.   That's some fun!  And a wee bit of exercise for a sloth like myself.
BEST KID QUOTE 
I'm not really sure how you spell Bee's gibberish as she looks at Christmas lights, but I wish I could can it!  I thought about driving around one more time in the car tonight to look at Christmas lights so I could video tape her, "OOOOWASSAT?!!  Ivearublkdosts!"  And looking over and smiling at us for confirmation.  Now THAT I wish I could bottle.
BEST VISUAL
We live atop a hill and had a stellar sunset on Christmas evening.  I took some pictures that I will share later. 
BEST NEWS
The BEST news has to be that my good friend Wendy told me on Christmas night that she is expecting after many years of prayers!  I am so happy for you!
BEST THING ABOUT CHRISTMAS
I hope you all had a wonderful time over the holiday with family and friends, but the best news is that Christmas is the celebration of the birth of Jesus-- God with us.  He came to earth, lived as fully man and fully God, lived a sinless life, and died a criminal's death in our behalf.  But that's just the beginning... He rose again after 3 days in the tomb, defeating death.  So now we have hope.  If you missed someone over the holidays that has gone on in death, you can have hope that you will see them again if you trust in Jesus Christ alone for your salvation. 
And, that, my friends is reason to celebrate.   
 

Laugh WITH me

Last night I was invited to go with some school friends to Sips N Strokes for the second time.   This is a place, that if you had any talent at all which I don't, is genius.  There are 2 locations now and I was told last night the owner is poised to open 10, yes TEN more in coming days.  The premise is, you bring your own "beverage" and paint.  Long tables are set up with easels and canvases, you get your brushes and paints, and you can sit with your friends, share a bottle of wine (or your jingle juice, or your cuervo, or your white russians, or your own personal bottle of whatever) and yuk it up as you attempt to paint the same picture. 
Each night there is a "theme" and an artist with a headset mic and a small stage tells and demonstrates what you are to do to achieve the night's painting, which you know ahead of time.  (Most people choose the night they want to attend based on the painting they want to make.)  Last night our ring-leader chose this "Retro Cross."
It's a lot of fun, and I showed up in Mr. Grits' old sweats that were covered in paint and a long sleeved t-shirt from the thrift store.  You don't get to do a girl's night out in that get-up very often but it was really great after a long day to get away with that.   
And all that said, I can NOT paint.  I'm looking around being so impressed with everyone and all they are doing and wanting to crawl under the table!  My painting looks like Sugie did it.  And I don't mean to insult her.  Ok, and just so you know I know you are going to comment and say, "Oh no, it's really quite good!"  But just so you know, you can laugh WITH me... 

And while you are at it, know that in the middle of the night I awoke with Sugie and Bee's stomach bug... I was in the bathroom "incapacitated" and lying on the cold tile floor for quite a bit screaming Mr. Grits' name at the top of my lungs... and he slept right through it..

Yes, laugh WITH me...
So without further ado...  "Retro Cross."

And this is what I did last time "Funky Tree."

More holiday recipes

Here are some recipes we made this weekend and are giving as teacher gifts, so if you are one of my children's teachers act surprised!

Easy Oreo Truffles Ok, I officially like THESE better than Oreos now!  Oh my!  Sister and I made these. 

Peanut Butter Balls    For the people who have asked for this recipe here it is... The recipe for this is for BARS which I usually make and it tastes like Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.  I just used the PB part, rolled it in balls and dipped in melted chocolate.  YUM. 

White Chocolate Covered Pretzels No link here.  Just gently melted white chocolate chips and pretzels.  Always a winner. 

Sugared Cranberries Just look at the picture with these!  They look yummy!  This is new for me and it doesn't contain chocolate and I STILL like it!  I couldn't find superfine sugar and tried to make it but it turned to powder, so I wound up using regular sugar.  They are really yummy and addictive.

Peppermint Cookies This jury is still out on this one...  chocolate with a dot or two of peppermint oil mixed in, and you coat Ritz crackers... I haven't made these yet so I may have to run a test batch, but this is the plan....

Anyone have any other great treat ideas?  I would LOVE to hear them!

Eatin' good at Christmastime

If you need a good dessert recipe this holiday season, here are a couple I'd love to recommend to you! 

Chocolate-Mint Cake -- Think of a York Peppermint Patty, reincarnated as a cake

Bourbon-Chocolate Cake with Praline Frosting -- One of the recipes in life that makes me want to cry

Eggnog Cheesecake  Oh stop rolling your eyes.  I LOVE eggnog!  My mom made this for my birthday once and it was major yum.  I think she used real rum instead of the extract, but don't tell her pastor cuz she's baptist... heh heh heh

I'll try to get some more later.